伦敦心有余悸之旅之：在街上遇到骗术很烂的老千

溺死的鱼

本来想开在欧洲旅游版的，但看到回复好像很少人看，所以决定开在这里。开这帖让我有点体会到那种出庭作证的被害人的感觉不过既然都已经发生了就写出来当做分享，如果大家有到伦敦的话就不要中他们的这种烂千。

先说明我的背景，我不是到英国旅游，其实是在这念书的。我住的城市叫Bristol在西南部，趁着假期想到伦敦去拜访朋友（从Bristol到London的车票来回£10罢了很便宜），因为早到了在街上闲晃，就遇到这等鸟事。

马来西亚有刮刮乐，英国有什么？英国有Fashion Designer！！

楼主尽量还原剧情，故事是这样的...   （以下简称 “我” & “千”）

我在街上走，突然有个人开车经过叫着了我。本着热心助人日行一善宗旨的整幅冤大头outlook的楼主就靠过去了，我想说，如果他是要问路，我至少得告诉他我不懂路，这是礼貌嘛。

千：（用一口的欧洲腔）Hi, are you a Spanish?

我：No I am not

千：Oh, nevermind. I'm a designer and I've got some trouble. I'll have to catch a flight later on 4 （当时是2点）, but my luggage is overweight, so I am giving some of my clothes away, I thought you are a Spanish so I stop you, where are you from?

我：Oh I'm from Malaysia

千：Oh Malaysia!! （兴奋状，然后对着他正讲着的手机...）I'll call you back later （大概是宣告：我找到冤大头了）Sorry that's my manager. I've been there before!! I like Sabah and... there's a place call Lomp... Lompuu... what is that place?

我：Oh you mean Kuala Lumpur?

千：Yeah Yeah Kuala Lumpur!! I've been there so many times（回想起我多年差点被老千搭讪的经历，之前在Puduraya也遇到过很热心的uncle走过来和你握手，然后问：小弟你要去哪里啊？无论你说哪里，他都会说：噢！！同乡同乡！！）I want to give you some clothes, do come over and take a look, I am on a rush, come get in the car.

我：But I'll have to meet someone later at 3

千：Yaya it'll be very fast, I am in a rush as well, come, hop on

本来这个时候我可以随便找个借口说我赶时间就可以推掉了，楼主也建议大家如果遇到这种烂老千也在这个时候“功成身退”，不过基于好奇心使然（可能和读的科系有关...），我就抱着Blues who say and the whos的精神（不入虎穴焉得虎子）上了贼船。当时我的心态就是：看你有什么把戏:@

（以下剧情皆发生在贼船内）

千：I am a designer and I work for Aromaaany, you know Aromaaany?

我：Huh? what is that?

千：You don't know Aromaaany? You know Guccci, Elllviii, Puraaada, and Aromaaany is branded stuffs

我：Oh you mean Armani

千：Yaya Armani, I am a designer for Giorgio Armani and I just finish the Fashion week, look my hotel is over there （随手指了一间和Giorgio Armani Designer身份不相符的寒酸酒店）let's find a parking, I'll show you. I want to give you my clothes, this is your lucky day. （Lucky Day???）

（随便停在大街，然后从后座乘客位拿了件镖头上写着Giorgio Armani的大衣出来“秀”给我看）

千：Look, this is so nice, I put on the Model and they all very like it. （然后还很热心地介绍该件衣服的功能，大概长这个样）



我：Ya, very nice, very nice.

千：Ya, and you see this, the label with the code, you can take it to the retail and ask for a refund at the Oxford Street （Oxford Street 牛津街是伦敦著名的名牌shopping区，有人有闲卡的话到伦敦都得去这地方血拼）, and this coat cost about £3,000

我：...（盯着这几块布心想：是不是哦........）

千：And look, see this 1 （又拿出另外一件水货）look at this, if you put on this you'll look so FASHION, if you put on this and when to a gathering people will amazed by you!! （大概长这个样）



我：...

千：And look at this 1, what is your size?

（大概长这个样）


我：I think it's medium?

千：You're lucky, it's your size!! （当然啦，不然难道找个200KG的人下手咩）

我：But I think it's a bit small?

千：No it's definitely your size, do you have a girlfriend?

我：Yes I have

千：Oh you're lucky, look at this coat, your girlfriend will be very happy if she receive this as her christmas gift!! （不是呱l连我女朋友都照顾埋？会不会等下给埋我老豆老母的份哦？？）

（这时他再次做出了和Giorgio Armani Designer身份又不相符的事，拿出他的街边价值£0.25的杂牌打火机来烧这个貌似真皮的女夹克，我知道你想证明这是真货，不过这位西班牙大哥你自导自演的戏也未免太烂了吧）

我：...

千：She will be very happy!! Do you like Armani? Do you FASHION?

我：No I can't afford that.

千：It's your Lucky Day !!（够了够了我知道了真的很Lucky给我免费看场酱好笑的戏）I am giving them to you!! C'mon put this on, （拿出了他的第一件大衣叫我穿上，在车里哦！！所以你是看不出到底好看还是不好看的）

我：....

千：You look so fashion!! Bravo!!!!! Fantastic !!! （）You look totally different with this!! And look what are you wearing now? You should put on them and you look so great!!! And with your jacket now you looks mammamia! （）

我：yeah yeah they are great

千：Of course they are great they cost £3,000

我：So what can I help you?

千：Look, I am giving this to you （拿出第一件） for free，and this （拿出第二件） for free， and this（拿出第三件）for free，and they cost around £20,000, and the last one cost £2,000 I'll sell  you for half price £1,000. Because I need to pay the car rent

...

...


出招了出招了！！！



我：But I don't have this money

千：I know you don't have, but Make Some!!

（反正这个时候只要硬扯就行了）

我：I really don't have the money, I'm just student here, and I've paid for my living, tuition fees etc etc

千：But I am giving you these Armani worth £20,000!!! you'll be rich if you go refund them!! （then why don't you just refund yourself）

我：but I really don't have the money

千：（一脸很累的样子）look, I am tired, just tell me, how much do you have in your bank account （一个Giorgio Armani Designer会在乎别人的银行有多少钱？）

我：£50

千：You must be kidding me, I am giving you stuffs worth £20,000, and you say you only have £50?!?!? A Spanish will give me thousands pound to buy these clothes （then you sell them to Spanish la What for lelong to me）Let's go to the machine, you take the money for me. （驾着他的车转了个路口）you give me your number, call me, I like you, I like Malaysia, I wanted to invite you to the London Fashion Show next year..... I don't know where is the bank... I am not local, is it this 1? （一个外地人可以在30秒以内找到他不懂在哪里的银行？）Go, go take the money for me

我：（唉，你要演戏，我就陪你演到底吧，随便按了个50块出来）this is all I have.

（此时楼主把£50给了他）

千：I am sure there is more money in your account, can you just give me another £50? （现在到他求我了？）

我：No I can't, I need that money

千：How much do you have in your account?

我：Why must I tell you?

千：You see, I am giving you these, you will be rich!! Nevermind, I give 2 of this to you, and I can't give you the coat as it is too expensive, I will go back and sell them to the hotel's manager.

我：（楼主还故作好心地问）So what about the rest of the rent? I didn't help you at all

千：Look, you don't understand, you don't understand, these are Armani!!

我：Why don't you just go and refund them?

千：No I can't it is just the end of the Fashion week, you can only refund it by tomorrow.

我：Please give me back my money, I don't feel so good

ELT

本来想开在欧洲旅游版的，但看到回复好像很少人看，所以决定开在这里。开这帖让我有点体会到那种出庭作证的 ...
溺死的鱼 发表于 25-12-2011 01:03 PM

楼住啊.. 要小心啊..最后你能拿回50 pound 吗?
那些coat.. 如果要买.. 我也会去专门店吗...
遇到这种情形.. 至好对着他说..  sorry i have no idea.. 就好了.. 何必那么好奇呢??

溺死的鱼

楼住啊.. 要小心啊..最后你能拿回50 pound 吗?
那些coat.. 如果要买.. 我也会去专门店吗...
遇到这种 ...
ELT 发表于 25-12-2011 08:11 PM

转载的人忘了贴完整

（此时那个烂老千竟然把钱给回楼主）

千：Why? Why are you feeling not good? You are so happy just now, I like Malaysia, I like you, I wanted to help you, why are you feeling not good?

我：I don't deserve this, I don't have the money, I don't want the clothes, I can't help you

千：Then why don't you just tell me you can't help me in the beginning?

我：Because you didn't say you want money from me

千：GET OUT OF MY CAR!!!

全篇玩。



我知道广大人民群众这时想说什么....




要笑你们就笑吧！！！我知道我笨！！！！


现在想起来真是惊险打一开始我就能随时走人，因为伦敦是个超多红绿灯，超多人，超会塞车的地方，所以他不可能把我载去哪里，车上没有其他人。不过这样挺身犯险也是不应该的。

真的很想跟那个老千说：想骗大马人？你多几年功夫先啦！！！你以为我是被吓大的啊？？？？他们这种是专门aim那些趁假期到英国扫名牌的人。不过他aim错我了，因为从一开始我就没有钱，也不懂名牌，也不想要名牌真想对他说：

就因为社会上太多这样的人，让我们的世界变得越来越冷漠。不过希望大家不要失去热心助人的良心。心中没有贪念，是不会中千技的。

祝大家出入平安。

Makan

这个巴黎也有哦
不过是个意大利的fashion designer

Star_en

給你一個贊。他不懂馬來西亞出名是老千。你要跟他說，叫他來馬來西亞拜師學几年先吧。

vvcrystal

大马人在这方面已经很精了

可是还是被非洲人骗了10亿

我是无赖

哈哈。。。 可爱的老千篇！！！

boonbin0386

楼主，怎么会那么好奇去看呢？不看就不会有是咯。。。

beefunny

谢谢楼主的分享  

Blake_oh

給你一個贊, 谢谢你的分享.

Star_en

大马人在这方面已经很精了

可是还是被非洲人骗了10亿
vvcrystal 发表于 26-12-2011 03:55 PM

那非洲人比我們更精了。那叫他去非洲囉。

dreamingguy

哈哈！！！很棒的经历嘛！！
处处要小心为上咯！！

kln

在英国无奇不有！不管朋友或亲戚为了自己的利益，会想尽办法骗你！身在异乡，为了自我保护，要变得坚强跟自私！

emilybeautyshop

LZ还可以和他聊将久，换是我赶快跑掉

Jaecie

呵呵，如果是我的话我一定会在发现他有古怪时说：apa? i don't speak english (with my perfect malaysian chinese accent)
楼主还敢上他的车，真是胆大
不过很高兴楼主能分享出自己的经验，可以告诫大家不管到哪里都不要贪小便宜，热心帮忙很重要，但自己也要机灵点，所谓防人之心不可无嘛，宁愿无所得也不要有所失。遇到有需要的人还是要帮的，只是这种不务正业骗人钱财的还是自保重要。

靓女

給你一個贊

Yee

你在London哪里遇到他的？我下个礼拜去London~哈哈看看会不会遇到

溺死的鱼

我可以理解大家嘲笑我的心情因为我每每看到报纸中老千技的人心里也是这么嘲笑着我们会这样想是因为我们是以第三者的身份看完了故事之后，试图改变结局，所谓老千就是不管用什么方法总会让你在当下不自知而上当。

那些去中国被中医师砍菜头的啊、被情场骗子骗掉几十万的啊、电话中奖的啊....

这个世界是没有早知道的啊

谁都不想受骗，所以也希望以后大家也多多体谅下受害人的心情，登报、开贴也只是要分享给大家知道希望不要再有人受骗罢了

大马人在这方面已经很精了
可是还是被非洲人骗了10亿
vvcrystal 发表于 26-12-2011 03:55 PM

看来越先进的国家千术越烂啊

在英国无奇不有！不管朋友或亲戚为了自己的利益，会想尽办法骗你！身在异乡，为了自我保护，要变得坚强跟自 ...
kln 发表于 26-12-2011 09:37 PM

这倒不必... 最重要不要kepoh就可以了我就是因为太kepoh才会kena

你在London哪里遇到他的？我下个礼拜去London~哈哈看看会不会遇到
Yee 发表于 27-12-2011 07:13 AM

在Chinatown附近，有幸遇见的话记得帮我报警一下他的电话是07501988995

韦伶

你真的是吃了豹子胆当早餐了吗？
怎么那么勇敢呀，在陌生的国度上了陌生人的车，
幸好你安全的全身而退
乖，下次不要再这样了

溺死的鱼

回复 20# 韦伶

没有下次了